Pasta Jokes: 80 Fun-silli Puns That Will Make You Laugh

1. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

2. What kind of pasta grants wishes? Fettugenie!

3. Why did the pasta and cooking water get divorced? Their relationship was strained!

4. What do you call pasta that has shrunk in the washing machine? Micro-ni.

5. How does a guy from Boston ask his minister to pass him the spaghetti at dinner? "Pastah pastah pastah."

6. What do you call partially cooked pasta that's on fire? Aldente's Inferno.

7. What pasta is always getting locked out of its house? Gnocchi!

8. What kind of pasta do they eat in Antarctica? Penguine!

9. What do you call something that looks like pasta, and tastes like pasta, but isn't pasta? An impasta.

10. Why wouldn't the fettuccine go out for Halloween? Because it was too Alfredo.

11. What do you call a little boy made of pasta who comes to life? Pi-gnocchi-o.

12. What kind of pasta do ghosts like to eat? Fettuccini afraido!

13. What's the most relaxing type of pasta? Spa-ghetti.

14. What do you call pasta that lives in the hood? Spaghetto.

15. How do you say goodbye to an Italian chef? Pasta la vista!

16. What type of pasta clings to everything? Clinguine!

17. What does expensive pasta cost? A pretty penne.

18. What do you call religious pasta? Raviholy.

19. What's the most humorous kind of pasta? Tortellini!

20. What type of pasta is best eaten on its own? Ravi-lonely.

21. What did the pasta say to the cheese? It's grate to meet you!

22. What did the pasta say to the tomato? Don't get saucy with me!

23. What do you call sick pasta? Mac n' sneeze!

24. What do you call a sad noodle? Upsetti spaghetti!

25. What is the saddest pasta? Tort-alone-i.

26. Where do the tomato and pasta go dancing? At the Meat Ball.

27. What kind of pasta does a cow eat? Moodles!

28. What's a dog's favourite type of pasta? Wagliataile!

29. What did the spaghetti say to the penne when they were walking too slow? Go pasta!

30. What do you get when you cross pasta with a dog? A labranoodle.

31. What did the ravioli play at his birthday party? Pasta parcel!

32. What type of pasta does the Pope eat? Holy macaroni!

33. What did the cheese say to the spaghetti? "I'm gonna touch you. Do I have your parmesan?"

34. What kind of pasta can make all your wishes come true? Fettugenie.

35. What would you get if you crossed pasta with a snake? Spaghetti that wraps itself around a fork!

36. What do ghosts eat for dinner? Spooketti.

37. What do you call pasta with a cold? Macaroni sneeze!

38. How much salt do lobsters use when cooking pasta? Just a pinch!

39. What's do you call a cross between the Abominable Snowman and pasta? Spag-yeti!

40. What did mummy pasta say to baby pasta? It's pasta your bedtime!

41. I spent my entire life savings on Pasta. It was worth every Penne.

42. My girlfriend left me because of what she described as my "Weird pasta fetish." Now I'm feeling cannelloni.

43. I'm starting a new pasta cult. May we praise the Noodle Lord for eternity. Ramen.

44. I told my wife I was making a bicycle out of spaghetti. She didn't believe me... Until I rode pasta.

45. Those that forget the pasta are doomed to reheat it.

46. Like unrinsed spaghetti noodles, good friends stick together.

47. I like to chat with others while eating Italian food. It helps to pasta time.

48. A chubby woman got stuck in the door of my local Italian buffet. I just couldn't get pasta.

49. I was at a buffet trying to get some spaghetti but a lady was blocking me... I couldn't get pasta.

50. I told my mom I wanted to have potato pasta for dinner. Her response? Gnocchi dokey.

51. I cannoli shake my head and marvel at how fantastic you are.

52. My partner laughed at me when I told her I was going to make a bike out of Macaroni. You should've seen her face when I cycled pasta.

53. I really like going to the Old Spaghetti Factory, but... I just wish they would make me a fresh plate.

54. My wife left me because I couldn't stop doing impressions of pasta. And now I'm cannelloni.

55. I'm not saying I'm a bad cook. But how long does pasta stay in the toaster?

56. Today is National Pasta Day. I have a friend that would have loved today, but sadly she's pastaway.

57. I broke up with my spaghetti, it was getting too clingy.

58. I taught my son about gravity by throwing pasta and sauce at the ceiling. He didn't get it at first, but it wasn't long before the penne dropped.

59. I've been trying to come up with a good pasta joke but it's in pasta bowl!

60. I stopped eating Italian food, now that's a thing of the pasta!

61. There are 500 types of pasta, the pastabilities are endless.

62. What do you call it when someone cries because their spaghetti is vegetarian? A meat bawl!

63. What do you get when you make a dish with marinara and alfredo sauce? The best of both pasta-bowl worlds!

64. Why does pasta always have to pay so much for car insurance? Because his car always ends up al dente.

65. What does Elton John have after getting drunk at an Italian restaurant? Penne and regrets.

66. Why did the woman miss the spaghetti train? Because it went straight pasta.

67. What type of pasta do crooked musical writers like? Rigatoni.

68. Did you hear the pasta makers in Italy revolted? It was a ravioli-tion.

69. What is the scariest type of pasta sauce? Mushroom and ghost cheese!

70. Do you know the Ghostbuster's catchphrase in Italian? "I ain't alfredo no ghost!"

71. Should Ric make the chicken parmigiana? No, ricotta make the lasagna!

72. What does expensive pasta cost? A pretty penne.

73. If I waited too long to eat my ravioli, would I be pro-pasta-anting?

74. What did the spaghetti say to the meatball at dinner time? Pasta sauce.

75. Why was the spaghetti so exhausted? Because it strained itself.

76. What do you call a plate of spaghetti that sells itself? A pastatute.

77. Opening a new restaurant, focusing on gourmet noodles and spaghetti. We're also going to offer free delivery. We're calling it Send Noods.

78. Why don't Italians have BBQs? The spaghetti falls through the grill.

79. I dropped a piece of pasta off of a cliff, It was a farfalle.

80. What do you call pasta that you haven't eaten yet? Futura!