75 Bald Jokes That Are Truly Shiny

Liputan6.com, Jakarta Laughter connects people across cultures, and bald jokes can bring fun to simple conversations. Many adults enjoy these jokes because they gently joke about something many people experience. Bald jokes can help people laugh and feel better about hair loss, which affects millions of men and some women around the world.

Telling bald jokes with friends can change how people see going bald. A good joke can turn worry into a smile. Some people who are bald even tell these jokes about themselves. When shared with kindness, bald jokes can help people feel more relaxed and comfortable with hair loss.

In this article, we have gathered some of the best and funniest bald jokes. Without further ado, let's check them out!

1. "Mommy, why is daddy bald?" "It's because he thinks a lot sweetheart." The kid stared at his mom for a minute and asked: "Is that why you have a lot of hair?"

2. "My girlfriend introduced our new baby to my friends, 'Look at those chubby cheeks and bald head', she said. I said, 'Thanks, but we're here to talk about the baby.'"

3. "My friend's been losing his hair and is really insecure about it, so I suggested he should get a transplant. He didn't go for it though – he thought he'd look stupid with a kidney on his head."

4. "Nobody wants to be alone. A recently divorced friend of mine is hopeful of once again finding romance. Beer belly, completely bald. I don't like her chances."

5. What do you call a bald guy named Gary? Garibaldi.

6. Did you hear about the bald man's will after he died? Turns out he didn't have any heirs.

7. Why do women trust bald men more than other men? Because bald men have nothing to hide!

8. "I like playing chess with bald people in the park. The problem is, it's kinda hard to find 32 of them."

9. "My wife was worried about getting older, so before she woke up on her birthday, I cut off all the white hairs she had. For some reason, she woke up bald and with a bad attitude."

10. What did my bald brother say when I gave him a comb as a gift? "Thanks. I will never ever part with this comb."

11. "Doctor, doctor my hair keeps falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in?" "Yes, here is a paper bag!"

12. "I once knew a bald guy who liked to draw rabbits on his head because from a distance, they looked like hares."

13. "My girl is so insecure... Even though she doesn't find any hair on my clothes she still be like 'Who's the bald chick?!'"

14. When do you know you're going bald? When you use more toothpaste than shampoo.

15. "I wouldn't say I was going bald, but... When I asked my barber to cut my hair, he replied, 'Which one?'"

16. What did the intelligent man say when he saw that he was turning bald in patches? He said that as he was a brainiac, his brain needed more space to expand!

17. How does a bald man get into a locked house? He picks the lock — with a key, not hairpins.

18. A bald guy killed all the barbers in my town. Boy, that was a hair-raising tragedy.

19. "I'm not saying you are going bald, but you'll find Waldo before you find your hairline."

20. A bald guy slipped in the shower. Fell on his head and slipped again.

21. "I first noticed I was going bald when it took longer and longer to wash my face."

22. Why did the bald man refuse a comb? He said, "I can't handle these split ends."

23. What did the balding thief say in the wig store? "Toupée or not toupée?"

24. Why did René Descartes say when he went bald? "Cogito hair go sum."

25. "I was fed up with people laughing at me for being bald, so I went out and bought a hairpiece. It was a small-price toupee."

26. How do you get a one-armed bald man out of a tree? Wave to him.

27. Why did the bald man take his comb to court? For a parting settlement.

28. Why did Harry Potter suddenly go bald in his teens? He lost his Hedwig.

29. What did my friend say when I became bald? "Jack, you are so bald that even Bob, the builder can't fix it for you."

30. Why did the bald guy leave the wig shop without a wig? Because he forgot to toupee.

1. "His head is brighter than my future."

2. "Beauty is only skin deep... I guess that's why you have hair."

3. "After years of being bare, the idea of hair doesn't sound too bad. It's starting to grow on me."

4. "The best thing about being tall and having a bald patch is that people think you're just tall."

5. "I can't tell if I'm going bald... or if it's all in my head."

6. "Being bald means you went back to your roots."

7. "I was gonna make a joke about a bald guy's hair. But then I remembered there was nothing to joke about."

8. "My luck is like a bald guy... who just won a comb."

9. Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man – there is your diamond in the rough.

10. "I want to change my hair like everybody during this quarantine. I think I'll grow my bald spot out!"

11. "I see you don't cut your hair any longer." "No sir, I cut it shorter."

12. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.

13. A bald actor has the biggest part in a play.

14. "People with hairless heads have problems. You cannot pretend that the hair you find in food is your own."

15. Imagine having a head that resembles a brand-new pot!

16. Bald men are meant to be more virile. The problem is they never get the chance to prove it.

17. What happened between a bald person and their hair? They had a falling out.

18. How does a bald man style his hair? With memories.

19. "With a body like this, who needs hair?"

20. "A recently divorced friend of mine is hopeful of once again finding romance. Beer belly, completely bald. I don't like her chances."

21. "Your head is so shiny that I can use it as a mirror."

22. "I am not saying you're losing your hair, but the lice on your head are starting to picket about deforestation."

23. "Wow, you noticed I'm balding, huh, Sherlock? Thanks for telling me, I had no idea!"

24. "If you wear a turtleneck shirt you will most definitely look like a roll-on deodorant."

25. How does a bald man answer the phone? "Headquarters, how can I help you?"

1. What's the difference between a bald man and an egg? Eggs get laid.

2. What do you call a balding web developer? A 404-head.

3. What do you call a group of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hairline.

4. Why are so many thieves bald? They dreadlocks.

5. Why doesn't the husband mind when his wife is leaving him due to his baldness? Because it's hair loss.

6. Why do bald people always look forward to sunny days? That's their time to shine.

7. Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower? Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!

8. What is the mantra that bald people live by? "Getting bald has nothing to do with losing hair, but it has a lot about gaining more head."

9. What do you call a bald man on a windy day? Fortunate.

10. What did the lice say to the bald man? "I'm falling!"

11. What do you call a barber that only works on bald people? An air stylist.

12. What is the funniest thing you can say to a bald man? "You are so bald that I can simply rub your head and start predicting futures!"

13. What kind of bird doesn't need a comb? A bald eagle.

14. What special day do bald people celebrate? They like to celebrate No-Hair Day.

15. Why is it against the law to hunt bald eagles? Because it's ill-eagle.

16. What's worse than finding hair in your food? Finding out the chef is bald.

17. What do you call a bald porcupine? Pointless.

18. Who is the most famous bald DJ? Calvin Hairless.

19. What did the barber say to the bald person when he entered the salon? "Hey, what are you doing hair?"

20. What is the best way to irritate a guy with a receding hairline who also has a thick beard? Simply ask him, "Why is your hair cut upside down?"