69 Food Quotes Funny for Instagram to Make Foodies Laugh

1. "I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."

2. "I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge."

3. "Home is wherever I’m with food."

4. "Carbs are the answer. No matter the question."

5. "Fries before guys…and pretty much everything else."

6. “Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first.” - Ernestine Ulmer

7. “My doctor told me I had to stop throwing intimate dinners for four unless there are three other people.” - Orson Welles

8. “People who love to eat are always the best people.” - Julia Child

9. “Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you.” - Bill Murray

10. “Great food is like great sex. The more you have the more you want.” - Gael Greene

11. "I love pizza so much that even when I eat pizza, I want pizza"

12. “You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”

13. “Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!” - Madeline Oles

14. “There’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box in your lap.” - Kevin James

15. "Sorry - I’m in a relationship. With food."

16. "My whole life is one big Big Mac."

17. "I love pizza. I want to marry it, but it would just be to eat her family at the wedding."

18. "Sugar, spice, and everything nice."

19. "The only clubs I’m interested in are sandwiches."

20. "Every day is National Doughnut Day if you put your mind to it."

21. "Let food be thy medicine and medicine be the food."

22. "I’ve forgotten a lot of things in life. A meal has never been one of them."

23. "The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta."

24. "Eating a croissant. Expectation: Fancy and French. Reality: Crumb apocalypse."

25. “Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.” - Jim Davis

26. “There’s not a better feeling in the world than a warm pizza on your lap.” - Kevin James

27. “All happiness depends on a leisurely breakfast.” - John Gunther

28. “He who does not mind his belly, will hardly mind anything else.” - Samuel Johnson

29. "Call me Kim Carbdashian."

30. "After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relatives."

31. "A slice of pie without cheese is like a kiss without a squeeze."

32. "Burger is always better."

33. "After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relatives."

34. “I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.” - A. Whitney Brown

35. "Food is an important part of a balanced diet."

36. "The first sip of a hot beverage is always the scariest sip."

37. "Clean eating journal. Day 1: I am a goddess and my body is a temple. Day 3: Well, that was fun."

38. "I make ice cream disappear. What’s your superpower?"

39. "Pilates? I thought you said pie and lattes!"

40. "If I share my food with you, it's a big deal."

41. "Brunch without champagne is just a sad breakfast."

42. “The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.” - Julia Child

43. “Never eat more than you can lift.” - Miss Piggy

44. “Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.” - Andrew W.K.

45. “Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what’s for lunch.” - Orson Welles

46. “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” - Charles Schulz

47. “A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.” - Barbara Johnson

48. “Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.” - Andrew W.K.

49. “A pizza slice a day keeps sadness away.”  - Jet Paacal

50. “Life’s too short. Start with dessert!” - Barbra Streisand

51. “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” - Erma Bombeck

52. “Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.” - Amy Neftzger

53. “I’d rather have leftover pizza than leftover feelings.” - Sarah Burgess

54. “My favorite time of day is to get up and eat leftovers from dinner, especially spicy food.” - David Byrne

55. “I won’t eat anything green.” - Kurt Cobain

56. “One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” - Virginia Woolf

57. “Health food may be good for the conscience but Oreos taste a hell of a lot better.” - Robert Redford

58. “Primarily I’m a meat man, although once in a while I toy with a few vegetables.” - Nat King Cole

59. "Always crust your instincts."

60. "Either I eat all my food or I eat all my food. There is no in between."

61. "Nine out of ten people love chocolate, and the 10th person is always lying."

62. "Even breakfast should begin with dessert."

63. "When you think you see your food coming at a restaurant, and then you realize it’s not yours."

64. "Let’s talk about brunch, baby. Let’s talk about you and me."

65. “I won’t eat any cereal that doesn’t turn the milk purple.” - Bill Watterson

66. “The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken.” - Maya Angelou

67. “First we eat, then we do everything else.” - M. F. K. Fisher

68. “Spaghetti can be eaten most successfully if you inhale it like a vacuum cleaner.” - Sophia Loren

69. “I only drink Champagne on two occasions, when I am in love and when I am not.” - Coco Chanel

And there you have it! Our journey through funny food quotes is coming to an end. Share these food quotes with your foodie buddies, and let laughter sprinkle over your food adventures.

Your Instagram photos deserve a touch of humor, turning every bite into a happy memory. In the world of food and humor, may your kitchen be a place of joy and your Instagram a gallery of smiles.