45 Funny Coffee Quotes to Add Joy to Your Daily Grind

1. "I want someone to look at me the way I look at coffee."

2. "Doctors found traces of blood in my coffee stream."

3. "The road to success is paved in coffee."

4. "Caffeine—it maintains my sunny personality."

5. "Life's too short to drink cheap coffee."

6. "May your coffee kick in before reality does."

7. "What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup." - Henry Rollins

8. "Deja Brew: The feeling that you've had this coffee before."

9. "Even bad coffee is better… than no coffee at all." - David Lynch

10. "Caffeine and sugar—the two basic food groups." - Laurell K. Hamilton

11. "Adventure in life is good. Consistency in coffee even better." - Justina Headley

12. "I like instant gratification. It's like instant Coffee, only it won't keep you up all night." - Jarod Kintz

13. "No one can understand the truth until he drinks of coffee's frothy goodness." - Sheik Abd-al-Kabir

14. "I have measured out my life with coffee spoons." - T.S. Eliot

15. "If it wasn't for coffee, I'd have no discernible personality at all." - David Letterman

16. "I gave up coffee. It's almost worse than giving up a lover." - Sandra Bullock

17. "Decaf? No, it's dangerous to dilute my caffeine stream."

18. "What do you want?… Just Coffee. Black–like my soul." - Cassandra Clare

19. "Did I run out of caffeine or are you really that boring?"

20. "Caffeine isn't a drug; it's a vitamin."

21. "Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank." - Alphonse Allais

22. "Decaf coffee only works if you throw it at people."

23. "Coffee smells like freshly ground heaven." - Jessi Lane

24. "May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short."

25. "Three cups of coffee a day keeps the doctor away!"

26. "Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break." - Earl Wilson

27. "I'd rather take coffee than compliments just now." - Louisa May Alcott

28. "I believe humans get a lot done, not because we're smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee." - Flash Rosenberg

29. "Politics now is rather like going into Starbucks for a coffee." - Rory Bremner

30. "Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?" - Jean Kerr

1. "Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after." - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

2. "A cup of gourmet coffee shared with a friend is happiness tasted and time well spent."

3. "There's nothing sweeter than a cup of bitter coffee." - Rian Aditia

4. "Coffee connects us in so many ways–to each other, to our senses, and to the earth that supports the coffee trees." - Rohan Marley

5. "Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister." - Bob Irwin

6. "How far behind would technology be, if no one ever discovered coffee?"

7. "Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it's hard to go back to sleep." - Fran Drescher

8. "As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?" - Cassandra Clare

9. "Our culture runs on coffee and gasoline—the first often tasting like the second." - Edward Abbey

10. "I'm going to start measuring the complexity of coding tasks in coffee cups. 'This was a five-espresso algorithm.'"

11. "The first cup is for the guest, the second for enjoyment, the third for the sword." - Old Arabic Saying

12. "Forever: the time it takes to brew the first pot of coffee in the morning."

13. "I judge a restaurant by the bread and by the coffee." - Burt Lancaster

14. "I could serve coffee using my rear as a ledge." - Jennifer Lopez

15. "It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity." - Dave Barry

Next time you're enjoying funny coffee quotes, remember to raise your mug to the wonderful world of coffee and all the joy it brings.